As the rain pours down on the window pane, and I sip steaming coffee reflecting on what the Lord is teaching me from His Word, and through life I am compelled to share with you.
Right now Pete and I are apart…just for a time. Pete is in Oklahoma, learning Cherokee and practicing the processes that we will use for language learning once we are working in Mexico. I am back in Wisconsin, for various reasons, church functions, weddings for friends, and more communication face to face with supporters and praying friends. It is hard being miles away from one another, but we know this is where God has us at this time and because of that we have a peace that only God gives.
Also, many of you are aware that I had been very sick. I had been dealing with stomach pain and issues when we left for Oklahoma on 8/24, ignored it, but things just got worse. On 9/8, after about 4 days of severe pain and no energy Pete took me to the emergency room in Tahlequah, OK where tests were run, and I was given a diagnosis of “Colitis.” This is a bacterial infection in the intestines which causes much pain and inflammation. The cause of my Colitis… an allergic reaction to an antibiotic I was given for oral surgery I had earlier in August. Ugh…how depressing. And I’ll be honest, I was depressed, in pain, and lonely in our little 10×10 concrete room with no windows in Oklahoma. I was going crazy, my body felt like it wasn’t me, I could barely even make it for a walk outside with Pete, I just wanted to lay back down.
During this time I read…alot…and talked to God. I truly felt His presence there with me each day that I spent in that room while Pete was out learning language. I have started to read through Genesis, to prepare me for discipleship once we begin to teach the gospel in Mexico. On my most painful day I read the story of Noah, and his obedience to God in building the ark and bringing on the animals just as God had told him too. He had an overwhelming concept of faith and trust in a God who’s promises never fail. God protected Noah and gave him peace as he floated on the water for 40 days and nights. They were the only living things in sight for God had covered the rest of the earth with the flood waters. God promises to Noah did not fail, and when the waters receeded God gave Noah a promise with the rainbow to never again destroy the earth by flood…and Noah rejoiced in God’s goodness even though, he had been placed now on the earth with no one else but his family. He had to start over and had to trust God for everything.
During this time, not knowing what was going on with my body I felt completely out of control…but now looking back on it, I know this is exactly where God wanted me to be. Some entries from my journal on Sept. 7th and Sept. 8th, my worst time, encourage me even today as I read back through them.
“As miserable as I have felt Lord I know you still know and feel what is going on in my body. Help me trust you, and your plan, and help me to make decisions about my healthy and not worry about how we are going to pay for it, or where the provision will come from. (this was before we decided to go to the hospital) Lord, thanks for healing me. I know you will, because you do not desire for your children to hurt in ways to hinder them from serving you. Also God, thanks for your peace. Because of it I know right now, no matter how I feel that I am in your will. I may not enjoy it, but I pray I would focus not on me, but on you and what you would have for me to learn and experience about you through this time. It is your mighty power and majesty that updholds me even when Iam at my weakest. God you say you are my strength, hope, Savior, and healer, all is true, and I know Your love. How can I not rejoice in all things, even this, when I feel weak and unable to do anything…for He is mine and I am His and nothing can take that hope away from me.”
It’s been two weeks since my visit to the ER, and I’m completely off of any antibiotics now, eating normal foods, and running again! I feel stronger everyday, and I know without a doubt the Lord is healing my body. Pete and I wanted to thank all of you who were praying for me, God hears, God listens, and the desires of our hearts become reality when they are in line with the desires of God’s heart.
I am encouraged that whatever valleys may come in my life that He is ALWAYS there. He does not walk away from me in the hard times, but lifts me up, and holds me, and reminds me that I am His and He will never leave me.